As fun as they can be, the holidays can also be particularly difficult for many in our community to navigate. This can stem from a mixture that includes: seeing family and/or friends who perhaps have not treated you well or respected your boundaries which could be triggering, being exposed to various environmental triggers (depending on the time of year), spending time in environments that may not be as familiar to you, feeling pressured to cook for large numbers of people, and/or feeling pressured to put yourself in situations that may not be best for you and your health. Although there is a lot that we can and will talk about specific to navigating the holidays, we hope this is a nice start.

1.) If you are going to someone else’s home, please make sure to verbalize any needs you have specific to exposure to fragrances (especially with MCAS), dietary restrictions, and other potential restrictions. It is important for these to be respected so you can enjoy yourself!

2.) Prepare an exit strategy in case your needs are not respected, and/or you experience symptom flares while at a gathering.

3.) Prepare one of your POTS travel bags to have with you if traveling (depending on which one meets your needs), found within our Traveling With POTS section.

4.) Prioritize what is most important and meaningful to you.

5.) Ask for help when possible and delegate tasks to ensure you are not over-extending yourself.

6.) Remember to pace yourself! Some pacing strategies around the holidays can include energy conservation strategies. Examples specific to decorating cookies can include buying pre-made dough, a cookie mix, or pre-made cookies to decorate to save more energy. Examples specific to preparing gifts can include using gift bags as opposed to wrapping them with wrapping paper, or displaying unwrapped gifts nicely in a few rooms for kids to find. Other general pacing strategies and a pacing handout can be found within our Pacing section.

7.) Choose decorations that are most meaningful to you and leave the rest for another time, depending on how much energy you have. It’s ok if you don’t use everything.

8.) Develop a schedule for each day that sets aside designated time for self-care strategies that may be grounding or provide you with more opportunities to rest.

9.) Choose to attend the holiday events that are most meaningful to you and that also consider your needs for safety. Examples can include events which take more precautions specific to respiratory viruses to help keep you safe.

10.) If family is coming to your home for meals, consider having a potluck where everyone brings a dish of their own, as this may reduce the amount of cooking for you. You can also consider declining to host holiday gatherings if you aren’t feeling well by setting some healthy boundaries. Some helpful phrases could include:

• “I don’t think hosting this year is best for me, but I would still love to contribute in a meaningful way.”

• “I won’t be able to host this year, but please keep me in mind again next year!”

• “It doesn’t look like hosting will be an option for me. How can I help in other ways?”

11.) If family is coming to your home for meals, consider using paper plates to reduce the amount of clean-up. You can also develop a clean-up plan ahead of time that involves everyone helping so all of the clean-up does not fall on you.

12.) Take advantage of other apps (see our Supportive Resources page for ideas), which can help make sure you get reminders to take your medications and have access to other tools that may help you.

13.) Practice a few phrases you feel you might need to say if your boundaries are not respected. Practicing ahead of time can be really helpful! We will include more content specific to this as we continue to add to our website, but some phrases that you can modify with someone you trust to meet your own specific needs are listed below:

• “It really hurts when you minimize something that has impacted me so significantly in that way.”

• “Not respecting my dietary restrictions makes me feel like you are not taking my concerns and my condition seriously.”

• “I am not comfortable talking about that right now, but I am happy to talk about other things with you.”

• “If you continue to make hurtful comments like that about my health I will need to leave.”

• “It doesn’t sound like you are listening to what I need right now.”

• “My wheelchair is an extension of me, please do not push me out of the way like that, it is very hurtful.”

• “Dismissing my concerns in that way makes me feel like you aren’t hearing me.”

14.) If needed, talk to a mental health professional you trust prior to gatherings and schedule appointments for after gatherings so you can properly process what may have come up for you. If you don’t work with a mental health professional, you can also consider scheduling a few phone calls with other people in your life who you trust, or other trusted resources.

15.) Be extra wary of brain fog and kitchen safety; see our Brain Fog section to learn more and access a helpful handout.

16.) Watching holiday movies can give you a great opportunity to relax while also enjoying time with family.

17.) Try to have FUN, as much fun as is possible! Immerse yourself in that self-care and listen, listen, listen to your body.